It is with great sadness that we announce the death of our sister and friend, Teri (Tess). Teri passed away on July 14, 2022 after a brief illness.
She is survived by her brother, Chuck (Debbie), nephew, Larry, niece, Marijke and their families in Ontario; sister, Cathy, nephew, James, niece, Melissa and their families in BC; sister, Peggy (Boris), nephews, Beau and Keith and their families also in BC; and sister, Diane (David), nephews, Mike and Matthew and their families in New Brunswick. She is also survived by several grandnieces and nephews and many cousins. Teri is also survived by many friends: Jeannette, Angie, Joan, Gisèle, Rebekah, Madeleine, Robin and so many others that this writer is unaware of but who were of no less importance to Teri. She was predeceased by her eldest sister, Joan in 2018; and nieces, Brenda, Terri, and Kim and their families).
Fierce is a word that describes Teri (Tess) as a sister, friend and large part of her personality. If Teri counted you as a friend and she your sister, she fiercely supported you, fiercely challenged you to be better, fiercely fought for you, and fiercely loved you. Teri would fight for you, and you were always, always grateful she was fighting on your side. Teri was also fiercely dedicated to being a nurse and nursing as a profession.
Direct is another quality that exemplified Teri. She directly asked you hard questions. She directly cut through any “politics” and directly let you know where she stood on any number of topics and situations. With pointed questions and focus, she directly solved problems and did not usually “beat around the bush” when needing to get to the heart of a problem or situation.
Teri was a very special and determined woman of strength. She had to learn to overcome dyslexia as a child and teenager at a time when there was little support for students with this challenge. Her sheer determination, desire and intelligence drove her to overcome the challenges of dyslexia to become a nurse. She earned her RN, her BSc in nursing and a master’s degree in psychology. Teri was a lifelong learner taking courses in business, psychology and spirituality as well as others. She was curious about the world, the environment and so much more.
Teri worked for 40 years as a nurse, spending most of her time working with seniors. She received her registered nursing education in Vegreville, Alberta. It was here that she developed and cherished lifelong friendships with her fellow classmates. These are friends that she kept in touch with for decades; she leaned on them for support, and in turn supported them. Teri and her classmates had many “grand adventures”, creating lasting memories that brought them all alternately laughter and tears while studying and working together in Vegreville. And most importantly, these days in her early 20’s brought her loyal and loving friends that she spoke of often, and kindly, for the rest of her life.
Early in Teri’s nursing career she spent time working in Saddle Lake and learned a great deal about Indigenous peoples and Indigenous spirituality. She loved and respected Indigenous traditions, and advocated for better and deeper understanding of Indigenous peoples and their culture and traditions. She strove to advocate for Indigenous peoples and truly understood the need for truth and reconciliation.
During her nursing career, Teri always advocated for her patients’ needs. She would take the time to truly listen to the seniors who were in her care, and she would be their voice and advocate. She would fight for them and for what they told her they wanted. Teri would then convey her patient’s desires to help their families understand and hear what their elders really wanted and needed to heal and recover. Teri would at times even challenge her nursing colleagues when advocating for her patients. Both fierce and direct would also best describe Teri as an advocate for her patients and in particular her patients who were seniors.
Teri loved chocolate and although she rarely if ever had a cherry blossom, this is the type of candy that would best describe her. She had a bit of a hard shell on the outside but her heart was soft and gooey on the inside. It was this “soft centre” or kind heart that she acted with most often. She would fight for her family and friends, advocate for her patients, and be generous with her time and finances. She would hire workers from the Bissell Centre to do odd jobs around the house and yard knowing that the people who would come and work for her really needed the money and support. She knew they were hard workers, just needing an opportunity to shine. Often, if a worker came to her house to do a job for her and they did not have proper work footwear, she would take them to get a pair of shoes or boots over and above the wages she would pay them so that they would not injure themselves. If it was wintertime and someone was coming to shovel snow for her and they arrived in running shoes, she would take them to get proper, warm winter boots so that they wouldn’t get frostbite while working for her.
If you ever had a disagreement with Teri (and we all did at one time or another) she could always be counted on to eventually “cool down” and you could always talk things out with her and “patch things up”. She just needed a bit of time to deal with her feelings and when she was ready, she was always willing to listen to you, your experience and your feelings – your side of the disagreement.
Teri went out of her way to help others. She gave generously from what she had to help out family members, friends and even strangers. She could always empathize with people who were struggling financially or suffering in some way. She felt her own pain deeply and so could then in turn understand the pain within others so she helped out where and when she could to ease the pain others in her life were feeling – both physical and emotional. Teri was aware of her own shortcomings. She was so grateful when we loved her, and in turn loved us back despite our shortcomings.
Besides family and friends the other great loves in her life were her pets. Despite being highly allergic to cats she had several. Her furry friends – Jolie “ma Cherie”, Luckie Ducky, Ishtar, and Soleta “my Chiquita” – warmed her heart and gave her many hours of comfort and joy. It brought her particular joy when Ishtar came to her home and shortly afterwards had 6 kittens which, naturally Teri helped deliver. She kept one kitten, Soleta. She took many pictures of these new born and young kittens before they left for their forever homes and put them in an album. Teri would spend a lot of time looking at these photos, especially when she was having a challenging day. These photos would help ground her in life, in love and in gratitude for new life. Teri also had several dogs as well, the last being Shen. Shen was her “good, good boy”, she loved him fiercely and was sad to leave him behind.
Teri has been a blessing and loyal presence in many people’s lives. She is missed by her family and friends and will be remembered with fondness and fierceness in return. Her memory will be a blessing, a spot of warmth in each of our hearts that will live on in each person she knew and who knew her. May the memories that you have of Teri’s warmth, her fierceness and her “gooiness” keep us striving to become better people, to help each other out, to be kind and to advocate for those who are in need of a champion. In lieu of flowers – hug a nurse, or just say thank you, pay it forward in a small or large way but most importantly live fiercely, love largely and act kindly.
There will be an intimate Celebration of Life on Monday, August 29, 2022 with interment of the urn afterwards at Holy Cross Cemetery in Edmonton.
Our most sincere sympathies to the family and friends of Mary Theresa Buhler 2022..
Death notice for the town of: Edmonton, Province: Alberta