DUE TO COVID 19: THERE WILL BE NO VISITATION AT CHAPEL RIDGE & THE GRAVESIDE INTERMENT/SERVICE WILL BE LIMITED TO IMMEDIATE FAMILY ONLY -AS WE ARE ONLY ALLOWED 10 PEOPLE AT THE GRAVE SITE
It is difficult to choose what things should be said about Dad’s life at a time such as this. These thoughts and memories are a compilation from each family member and certainly only touch the surface of who he was…
Since we are unable to have a service to honour Dad, this eulogy is instead being sent as a PDF to each of Dad’s friends as well as to the family.
Each of you will have your own special memories of Dad and how he impacted your life. Our hope is that the influence Dad made in your life, lives on in your memories.
Grandma and Grandpa Dornan, Bob and May, immigrated separately from Northern Ireland, were married soon after Grandma arrived in Winnipeg where she joined Grandpa who had come ahead of her.
A year later, Dad was born on May 14, 1925, their only child.
When Dad was a toddler, they moved to Toronto where he spent most of his life.
As a child Dad, was creative, liked to draw, was an innovator and problem solver.
One story he liked to tell was of one of his first big inventions as a young boy. He and his friend Albert, who lived behind them, rigged up a pully system with a box that moved along it, so they could send each other secret messages without their parents knowing.
This creative and inventive skill developed well into his
adult life. Dad always seemed to know how to fix anything, make it work better, make things and problem solved ways to sort it out something that was not working well.
Dad had a deep sense of duty and out of that, he enlisted in the RCAF to train as a flight engineer in the Lancaster bomber.
However, as his training progressed, so did the war and he ended up being discharged as the war was coming to an end, without ever having had a flight.
That was until 2017….
Thanks to the “Make a Wish Foundation” through Chartwell,
where Dad was living at the time, he put in his request to have
“wish of a lifetime” request of a flight in the Lancaster Bomber, never thinking it would happen, but it did.
A “flight of a lifetime” summed it all up!
It was a day none of us will ever forget and one that dad often
spoke of the joy and thrill of it.
At the end of the flight, the crew made him an honourary crew member, giving him badges to certify that… another highlight for him.
Thank you once again to Chartwell Make A Wish for making this dream become possible!
Once Dad was no longer enlisted, he began a long career in sales and marketing and over the years worked for various companies plus a not for profit, faith based organization.
Dads’ customers knew “his word was his word”, he was a man of integrity, was honest and always gave 110%.
In the early 1950’s Dad, along with his parents joined the Gideon’s organization. This proved to have many great outcomes, one of which was meeting Mom! They married in 1951 at Peoples Church, which was then on Bloor St.
Soon, a couple, became a family of 4, and when Cathy was a
toddler, the family moved to Kitchener where we lived for many years.
5 years after we moved, the family increased once more when
Ron was born.
Faith was always a central part of Dads life from his youth to his very last breath.
At the church we attended in Kitchener, Dad served in church leadership, led the singing and joined the men’s choir that regularly went to the Guelph Penitentiary to sing for the inmates. Over the years, in Toronto and Markham he also sang in other choirs and church productions. Dad truly enjoyed music of many genres and singing.
Pipe organ music was a favourite, as was classical, hymns, Celtic, bagpipes and show tunes/easy listening.
At other churches Mom and Dad attended in Toronto, Dad served in varied leadership roles, led a monthly Sr ‘s group, did counselling, served as a lay chaplain at their local hospital and visited church members who were ill.
While living in Toronto we worshipped at a few churches but
settled at Peoples church for several years as a family.
Dad helped out with a Sunday morning college age group and also started a car club, mentoring mostly young men, on how to repair, do body work, etc., on cars.
Our garage eventually became a workshop for cars, motorcycles, minibikes, etc.
During the years we lived in Kitchener, Dad joined a local model railroad club there, called the “Boomers”. He loved the model building, layout planning, wiring, made to scale scenery, etc., plus the comradery. This was a great way for his creative and social side to blossom.
This hobby has led to lifelong friendships.
When Mom and Dad moved to Markham, Dad met Bob,
Malcolm and Cyril who also share a passion for model trains and planes. They helped build Dad’s train layout, that filled a room in the basement of their home at Swan Lake (plus eventually expanded through the wall into his office next door!)
Anyone who visited their home was invited to don a train hat,
blow a train whistle and watch the steam trains move around his amazing, lifelike layout. This was Dad’s pride and great joy!
Dad (and Mom) loved to travel. Their annual fall and winter trips to their Florida timeshare was a highlight. There, Dad became the unofficial “social convenor” for the resort, arranging group dinners for any and all who wanted to go.
A dominant gift of his was to include people in social events and to help them feel they belonged. He did this wherever he went!
The cottage on Chandos Lake was also a special place to Dad.
He proposed to Mom there, was baptized in the lake, helped out with the Sunday summer church services at the outdoor chapel, waterskied, fished, built things…etc. Most of all he loved being by the water. There were always lots of jobs to do but the afternoons were typically set aside for swimming, waterskiing, fishing and playing horseshoes, plus marshmallow roasts by the lakeside fire pit at night.
Over the years, the Dornan family grew as each of us married.
In 1980, the first grandchild came, followed by 5 more, making it a total of 4 grandsons and 2 granddaughters: Paul, Phil, Jeff,
Eric, Stephanie and Amanda.
“Poppa” was a cherished role and a much-loved man.
“Poppa” kept confidences, gave advice, attended the grandkids sports games, graduations, music concerts…loving each one and celebrating the grandchild involved.
Dad also enjoyed his role as Uncle, to Steve (Nadia), the late Andrew and Carolyn (Victor). He always felt Aunt Norma was the sister he never had by birth as they shared a special and close relationship. Dad said he has so many fond memories of them and prayed for them daily.
When Steve and Carolyn learned of Dad’s failing health they sent along their thoughts:
“Your life Uncle Jim glowed mightily with the reflections of Christ’s love that touched everyone who knew you. Your life has always been an example of faith in action to me.” Steve Alm
A Celtic blessing was also included:
“May the blessing of light be upon you,
Light without and light within,
May the blessed “Son” light shine on you and warm your heart
‘til it glows like a great peat fire”
“Please let Uncle Jim know that forever there will be a special place in my heart that only he fills.” Carolyn (Alm) Santos
The grandchildren grew into adulthood and weddings began for the next generation….
Paul married Karen in Darwin, Australia; Phil married Leslie in
Portugal; Amanda married Alain in Toronto where Dad had the
special honour of assisting with their ceremony. He had
hoped to attend Jeff and Diana’s ceremony in Oshawa, but his health prevented that, so sent his best wishes instead.
Poppa loved the emails, letters, notes, etc. sent to him from
grandchildren and treasured each of them.
Now… great grandchildren have been added.
In 2018 Arlo was born, then Ivy in 2019 and in the summer of 2020, both Hannah and Aunica were born.
Dad had 3 bulletin boards in his suite, each overflowing with photos of the great grandchildren and proudly directed staff to look at new photos, plus at all the family photos placed around his room.
Dad had a special passion to bring joy to others and encourage
them. One way he shared this pleasure was at Christmas
when, in 1985 he “became” Santa.
He was a perfect Santa from the authentic wig/beard right down to his boots and his “ho ho ho”.
Together Dad…and Mom, visited hospitals, homes and schools during the weeks before Christmas and on Christmas Eve until in 2008 when he “retired” from this role.
Dad was a wonderful son and son-in-law.
He helped care for the needs of his aging parents, had Grandma D. live with him and Mom for a few years after Grandpa passed away, until her health required more assistance. Then Dad advocated for her and visited her daily. Dad also did this for Mom’s Dad and stepmom. As soon as there was a call, Dad was in the car on his way to assist in whatever way was needed.
As Moms’ health deteriorated, this is when Dad shone as a loving spouse and care giver.
He was amazing, never complaining at the tasks he had to do for Mom, wanting to maintain her dignity and independence as long as was possible, but most of all, he made sure that on each day, she lived it as best as she could.
This cognitive change in Mom required them to move from Swan Lake into retirement living at Rouge Valley where they spent many years together. Dad resided there for a total of 10 years.
Rouge Valley was truly home. Thank you to each one of the staff who made it so! Each staff person was always warm and welcoming, had lots of fun and Dad fully participated in life there.
Soon after they moved in, Dad got embedded into active life.
He became the president of the residents’ council, led a hymn sing and started a pool club. The men (and then a few women) who joined, had so many wonderful hours around the pool table…they even had a trophy that the weekly winner kept and passed to the next winner, etc.
These residents became very good friends.
Dad offered daily greetings and encouragement to each of the staff, took a personal interest in each of them, shared his faith, prayed for them daily and also gave advice…(even if unsolicited) .
This is something Dad continued at Taunton Mills when he moved there in late 2019.
Taunton Mills became another very special home…filled with
caring staff. We cannot say enough about how special the staff have been.
This last year and a half of his life was enriched by the care given to him and he participated as much as he was able.
COVID-19 really challenged everything and made life move at a slower pace, then to not move at all for Dad.
Dad endeavoured to live out his faith with a polite, kind, positive attitude, praying for the staff daily and answering deep questions about what made him “tick”. He was often known as the unofficial chaplain for staff and fellow residents.
Dad had his own ministry of care wherever he resided.
Dad’s suite initially overlooked a construction site, that over the winter months of 2020, transformed into a wonderful community parkette. Daily, we got updates as to what work was being done and then how it was being enjoyed by families and Sr. residents that he could see from his window. This window to the outside world gave him something new to watch daily and to engage in from afar, guessing what would come next, what they were doing, etc.
Dad loved baseball and an annual outing was with Ron,
Jeff and Eric to Skydome… Dad LOVED this time with the guys!
One night, at a game, Dad even caught a fly ball that is now
immortalized in a plastic case! He even had his own Blue Jay shirt with his name on the back to wear to games.
Most of all Dad loved family events…this could be a quiet dinner around their dining room table, backyard BBQ’s, birthday parties, weddings, births…anything that involved family.
Dad loved sending e-cards and receiving emails from the family
that is spread around the world.
He enjoyed the Skype calls from overseas but most of all the face-to-face visits or even more…hugs. He did his best to keep up to speed with technology so he could connect online and took pride in each new skill he acquired.
The Covid-19 restrictions were super hard on Dad as well as for each person, especially those living in care homes.
Being isolated from each of us and especially not being able to be with him during these past challenging months was especially hard for most of the family.
Daily calls and video skype chats happened when he was up to it, were great but… hugs are better…and he/we each missed giving and receiving them from him.
Over these past months, Cathy and Dave were his designated essential care givers and witnessed a steady flow of staff coming to give him their warm greetings at the start of their shift, midway in their shift or at the end of their day; some came with tears; some prayed with him and most simply wanted him to know how much of an impact he had made in their life.
This was very special and moving for Cathy and Dave to observe!
Dad said several times over these past months that the one thing needed at Taunton Mills was a HUGE heart painted on the side of the building, as that is what makes the place special because it is the caring staff who genuinely love their job and the people they care for.
We cannot say enough “thank you’s” to the staff for the many ways you showed your care to Dad as he declined. He very much appreciated each one of you!
When Cathy and Dave could not be there as Dad’s “essential caregivers”, we knew as a family that he was in good hands.
Most of all…Dad loved his family and we each have so many
treasured memories of chats, calls, car repairs shared, events
shared, jokes, discussions around business plans, graduation
moments, travels, renovation home/cottage chats….
A lifetime of special moments for each of us to hold dearly in
our hearts!
Dad frequently commented over these past months in particular, how fortunate he was to have his family and we were deeply blessed with the parents God gave to us!
Over these past days, Cathy was able to sit with Dad, held his hand for hours at a time, wiped his tears when emotions overwhelmed him, prayed with him, played hymns on his Ipad and was able to hug him to bring comfort …
This was very difficult at times, but also extra special at the same time and was done on behalf of each of the family.
Many of you reading this will feel Dads’ passing
deeply…just as we do. You too will have had special and treasured memories of times spent with him. Dad was a
“one-of-a-kind man”. He prayed much for people and cared deeply for others.
Dad left a deep, positive mark wherever he went and will be
greatly missed…A big hole has been left with his passing.
This has only highlighted a few things about Dad’s almost 96 years, of the ways he was special, plus events and people that brought joy to him.
Dad so very much looked forward to arriving into heaven yet also wanted more time on earth, so he would not miss anything. This dilemma was challenging for him…and is a normal one each person faces as the end-of-life approaches.
Dad’s decline was slow and difficult on many days as he became more dependent on others.
Dad lived a life of purpose, meaning, faith, integrity and has left a legacy in the lives of those he touched and many have forever been changed by meeting him.
While we look back over Dad’s life, today, we also celebrate Dad’s arrival into heaven…and hearing His Lord and Saviour say to him “well done my good and faithful servant”.
When he and Cathy talked about this arrival before New Years, he often cried tears of hope and joy at soon being able to hear those words said to him.
He longed to be in heaven yet longed to stay here longer as well.
We can picture him now, his social convenor role in
high gear…greeting newcomers at heavens’ pearly gates, welcoming them in, hand extended (no COVID fears now) and a big smile, telling them how great it is to see them and how wonderful a place it is!
Heaven is richer with Dad’s arrival…and each of us have a wonderful life legacy to remember, be challenged by and treasure.
Dad did not like to say goodbye, but instead would say ”see you later”…meaning, if he passed away before you saw him next, he would see you in heaven.
Today we say, “See you later Dad”.
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Our most sincere sympathies to the family and friends of Jim Dornan Friday April 16th 2021..
Death notice for the town of: Markham, Province: Ontario