Elinor Royce Stegen
August 02, 1928 – November 01, 2020
Grammy’s Story
(The following was written several years ago by granddaughter Samantha Elinor Stegen as part of a Junior High Assignment)
Most people wonder where their middle name originates from, that’s the question I asked myself. Elinor Royce Cornwell is currently the grandmother of six grandchildren. I being one of them was more interested in her past, the part of her life I nor was my father alive for. Elinor was the third of six children. She could be identified as one of a kind since both her older and younger siblings were twins. Elinor had curly golden red hair and was quite tall for a girl in the 1930’s. She was born at St. Catherine’s Hospital in Ontario, which was rare for her era. Elinor lived in Beams Ville with her parents Lena and Roy Cornwell. At around age 10, Elinor and her family moved to Crystal Beach. They had many jobs to provide for their full-sized family. Even though Roy never studied past grade six, he owned a diner with his wife called Radial Diner and he also ran a hardware store and drove a truck. Lena was a school teacher and a tutor. Lena also helped out with all the family’s businesses. Marjorie Cornwell, one of Elinor’s older twin sisters tells us the story of my grandmother.
Lena and Roy celebrated the birth of to twins Marjorie and Marion. Soon later they had Elinor; she was the middle child and “the odd one out.” Next was the birth of twins Douglas (the only boy) and Dorothy. Marge states that the many sisters and brothers were so exciting and she can recall one vivid memory of the excitement it brought. Douglas and Dorothy were born in their house in Beams Ville. That day Roy Cornwell came into the living room, starred at his three young children and said “Come on Marge, Marion and Elinor, I got a surprise for ya.” He then showed them their newly born siblings, sleeping quietly in two wicker baskets.
They lived in a huge “State House” that had a huge brick yard with a pond that was perfect for skating on in the winter. “I can draw ya a picture of it.” says Marjorie. All of the children spent most of their free time outside exploring the fascinating backyard, but Marge recalls that Elinor’s favourite pass time was playing with paper dolls. She would cut them out from paper and make them new clothes. “We made our own fun.” Even today she is amazing at sewing, knitting and much more. I have a box of Barbie doll clothes that she made for me and my sister; I know I will always keep them dear to me so that one day my grandchildren’s children will have the privilege to play with them as well.
Elinor attended Ridge Way High School and was an easy-going teen. She did not have the support of her oldest twin sisters because they were both gone to work in 1943. “We had our squabbles, but we had some great times together” exclaims Marge. It was a hard time for everyone. Elinor finished high school then went on to nursing; she went off to work for the Navy. Elinor worked there on and off for around 15 years. In those years her life changed. She fell in love. James Stegen was a first a radio operator in the Navy. His innovative mind led him to his dream job and his dream girl. James then became a sailor, then a pilot, then reaching his highest peak when he was promoted to commander. The two of them, romantically in love went home with friends and family to be wed. They were married in Crystal Beach, Ontario in 1955.
James and Elinor were very content. They lived in many homes because of their demanding jobs and also had three blessed children. Cindy Stegen was first to be born in 1957. Her younger brother Ronald Stegen was the middle child born in 1960. The youngest is Andrew Stegen, who is 20 months younger then Ron. Today she is very fragile, but I still see that young girl who I set out to become.
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My deepest memory of my Mother
Submitted by son Ron
Many years and several dozen pounds ago in our youth, my brother and I swam competitively. After swim practice every evening, we would arrive home with absolutely voracious appetites, and Mom would have her usual home cooked meal ready. One particular evening, when I was about 15 years old or so, Mom had one of my favorites on the go; steaming hot pork chops and scalloped potatoes (second only to her delicious lasagna). She served us a heaping plateful, and just as she sat down to her own meal, my dinner was wolfed down and my plate empty. Mom got up and gave me another porkchop and second round of fixings – this too was gone in seconds and I looked around to see if there was anymore. Mom finally sat down to eat her own meal, took a bite or two, noticed my still ravenous eyes, and asked me if I wanted her porkchop and potatoes. Of course I said no, I was fine, I couldn’t do that, but she insisted. She explained that she wasn’t really hungry as she had picked away at the food while she was preparing supper. I protested again, but she assured me she was already full, and having me convinced, Mom slid the porkchop onto my plate. I made short order of that one too, and headed up to my room to do some homework, selfishly leaving my Mom to clean up the dishes. She never complained.
An hour or two later, I came down to an empty and darkened kitchen in search of more calories. I went straight to the fridge, stuck my head in, and rummaged around. I thought I heard a noise behind me, glanced around, but no one was there so I went back to the hunt. I grabbed something and turned around to leave. It was then that I saw her – sitting in the corner trying to hide. Mom had a bowl of cereal in her hand, and the spoon was still in her mouth as she tried to be quiet and stay undiscovered.
I remember the overwhelming and utter shame I felt, realizing that I had taken food out of my mother’s mouth. I still blush with embarrassment as I write about it today. This feeling of guilt was only slightly softened by my new insight of how much I was cared for, and the security and warmth of a Mother’s unconditional love. It was a lesson and an example that I tried to emulate for the rest of my life, and when I had my own children, it became clearer still. While this was just a pork chop, I knew then and there that she must have made many sacrifices far bigger than that as she raised me and our family.
She was a great Mom to me, and I couldn’t have asked for anything more.
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Submitted by daughter Cindy Webster and son Andrew
We are very blessed to have had Elinor as a Mom, Grandmother and Great Grandmother. Following in her own Mother’s footsteps, one of her missions in life was to ensure the well- being and happiness of her children, grand-children, family members and close friends.
Mom was born in St. Catherine’s, Ontario, and truly as her own individual as her two older siblings were a set of twins, as well as her two younger siblings. Growing up in such a large family, influenced by the great depression and the war meant she learned to stretch a dollar and not to waste. Something that she carried with her through life and one of the life lessons she taught her children and grandchildren.
After graduating from nursing in St. Catherine’s, Ontario, she enlisted as an Officer in the Royal Canadian Navy. There, she met her husband James (Jim) Stegen (Dad). When they married, she gave up her Navy Commission so Dad could pursue his dream to become a naval pilot. Mom continued to work in Naval hospitals as a civilian nurse but when Dad’s time away from home became more extensive, she decided to give up nursing so she could provide some stability to the life of their three children. Being a naval wife was not easy, especially when Dad was on tour, and Mom had to handle the household on her own. There were challenging times… it is hard to imagine how she kept sane, when she had to organize a move from Halifax to Victoria with three children all under the age of ten (without Dad’s help as he was at sea for six months). This included trying to finding a place to live when we arrived in Victoria, all without the ability or ease of the internet. We can recall only once, when she became overwhelmed with the military life…the day we were notified that we were moving yet again…for the fourth year in a row! Mom refused to get out of her pajamas that day!
Mom’s dedication to family continued when the grandchildren were born. She provided home care when complications arose with her children or grand-children, no questions asked and with her nursing background and dedication to family she sure shone. Her grandchildren held a special place in her heart, there was always a small treat (usually a toy saved from a cereal box) waiting in the “kids’ bedroom” whenever the grandchildren visited. It was always a scramble for the kids to get up the stairs and see what special treat was waiting.
Homemade meals were one of her domains, frozen/pre-made meals were a rarity in her house. She was known for her special occasion feasts and table decorations and home-made cookies.
Mom’s care and love was sewn, cross-stitched, knitted, and crocheted into the numerous items she made for her children, grandchildren, friends and extended family. In addition, she was known for her hand- made Barbie doll clothes she made for numerous charities to sell at their teas and craft shows.
As her health declined and she was unable to continue with her crafts her dedication and interest in her family remained strong. She always had an interest in what everyone was doing and where they were going, had a wry comment, life lesson to share or a good-natured lecture about the virtues and benefits of proper appearances and attire.
In Mom and Dad’s final years, the staff at Shannex, Baker Drive provided a level of care and comfort that they both deserved. Her family wishes to thank the staff (too numerous to mention) for their dedication and hard work in providing such great care to Mom & Dad during those years. Although Mom is gone, her lessons will continue to influence her families’ lives and her handmade crafts will remain cherished heirlooms for years to come.
August 02 1928 November 01 2020
Nos plus sincères sympathies à la famille et aux amis de Elinor Royce Stegen August 02 1928 November 01 2020..
Décès pour la Ville: Dartmouth, Province: Nova Scotia